In truth, he does not know why he had followed her. The sensible part of him rages at his actions, at his stupidity. That sensible part wants to deny the shadows, deny the monster he has become. Deny that any of this could ever have happened. But he is starting to believe that the sensible part of him is not so very sensible after all. The shadows are not temporary. They are tied to him now, an integral part of him that he is no longer certain he would rid himself of, even if he could.

He is at war within himself, and it shows upon the surface, shows in the tension of his body, the wildness of his eye. He has followed her, but he is too close to breaking. In the end, something has to give. And he knows he will not be the same man when he comes out on the other side.

She can help, he thinks. She can teach, and he can learn. He should learn. This fight cannot continue, he cannot keep draining himself in an endless battle, exhausting himself over and over until nothing is left but skin and bone and shadow.

She blends so perfectly with the inky depths surrounding them, but he tracks her all the same. He can feel the shadows much like he can feel his legs and the ears atop his head. He can tell where they end and she begins. They whisper quietly to him, a constant soothing hum inside his mind. They tell him secrets and stories, of the creatures hiding within their heart. He has never felt so close to them. Having avoided the darkest depths of shadow for as long as he had, he had never before had the opportunity. It is thrilling and comforting all at the same time.

He almost doesn’t hear her demand, lost as he is in the sensation of this latest discovery. He frowns when her words sink in, chocolate brown eyes focusing once again on her. Practice, she tells him. And then the two halves of him are there, pushing and pulling, urging and restraining.

I… I don’t know if I can.

His words are low, halting. He has never consciously tried to control the shadows. He is not even sure he wishes to. He glances at the shadow in question, skepticism in his gaze. And suddenly that shadow bows out wildly, bleeding and slithering across the earth towards them in an unrestrained display.

shahrizai

hestoni x scorch