He heard her confusion, heard her thoughts, too. Tried to ignore both. Okay, she said softly before slipping into their familiar silent speech again. He still stared out, not really seeing anything, his thoughts tangled and hurting. Are you okay? He hesitated. Then nodded shortly.

You can talk to me, if you want, she offered. I can't, he thought back. Everything suddenly felt so heavy, too much weight bearing down on him. A strange pain started in his back, a clutching grasp around his chest and squeezing. He wanted things he couldn't have, things he shouldn't want. Maybe he should go back and find Kylin. No, that felt painful too. Maybe he should just go off somewhere and be alone.

Maybe he should always be alone.

"We can walk toward the river, if... I mean, if that's what you want to do." It wasn't. It definitely wasn't. But he couldn't do the things he wanted. He couldn't lose his dad. Pain, sharp blades in his chest. His jaw clenched and his eyes were as bare and conflicted as he was. Vulnerable. He was the brother -brother- he wasn't meant to be vulnerable.

He swallowed and stood, his shoulders wilted and heavy, still staring out so far away from their island. Wishing things could be different. "Or we could go farther. Maybe there's another island out there that we haven't seen yet." He looked at her, expressionless. Like Mother. She'd wanted to go to the river, though. He should take her to the river.

But out there, it was tempting, and his gaze slid back to it, where the sky met the sea. Out there, where no one could find them. Where no one would see, no one had to know. Where he could be free to be himself. His grandfather. She probably didn't want it though, not like Kylin did. She didn't really understand. He clenched his teeth again, but knew he wanted to go anyway. "Let's go farther." And he started walking with his wings folded at his sides, trying to focus on the sun warming his damp skin from where he'd laid on the water with her.

"Farther," she agreed, and they walked in silence. He didn't lift his wing for her, and she didn't ask him to. She gave him space, let him twist and tangle in his thoughts. This sucked. Maybe he was being responsible, though. Maybe Dad would have been proud or something. But it definitely sucked.

You can, you know, she sent so gently, reaching to touch his cheek. The contact softened the hard stare of his eyes and he shifted a little closer, brushing his lips across that velvet nose. He couldn't talk to her about it, he definitely couldn't. But she didn't understand that, of course. And he wouldn't tell her. She would think less of him, and he wouldn't be able to avoid hearing it. You can talk to me. Whatever it is, you don't have to be alone in it.

She sighed and pressed her face into his neck. He wished it didn't feel so good. So perfect. "Or if you'd rather, we can talk about anything you want. Do anything you want. Just be here with me, okay?" He nodded, but he wasn't sure she saw it as she stepped in front of him, making him stop. Then she was there against his chest, hugging him to her with her head over his shoulders.

He was stiff at first. Then his tension fell away, slid down his legs and into the sea just as the water had. He sighed quietly and pulled her closer too, held her tighter. Still wishing he could have more. She was so beautiful. Kylin, too. He loved how she cared for him, though. How his happiness was suddenly the only thing that mattered to her. He was so stupid. He'd ruined her day out. It's going to be okay, Khari.

I'm sorry, Kali, he sighed, twisting his hold on her to drape his foreleg over her shoulders and bury his face against her neck. His forehead rubbed into her, and he breathed her scent so deeply, letting it soothe his nerves. He lifted his head and pushed his chest to her shoulder, nibbling through her hair and at the roots. I didn't mean to mess up our day. I don't mean to go distant like that. Come on, we'll do whatever you want now. You're in charge. He smiled, nipping lightly at her neck.

It felt so, so good pressed against her. She reassured him more, and he hated that she'd needed to. God, he was so stupid. But Dad would have been happy. He was still doing good. Still holding back from kissing on her neck every time he leaned in close, from pushing more of himself against her or kissing her face. Damn, but he still wanted to.

He was doing good though.
It just sucked. Dad would be pleased.

She relaxed with him, just as he did, and was smiling again. It's okay, Khari, she told him, promising he hadn't messed up their day after all. He leaned against her more, feeling the warmth of her skin and soaking it in. She reached then, pressing her lips to his neck and sending little ripples of electricity through to his shoulders, brushing her nose against him. He forced out a stuttering sigh. He liked that too much, too.

She smiled, and laughed. I'm in charge, huh? And he instantly loved that little shine in her eyes, already curious what she would choose for them to do. Then I think it's time for a new game, since I won our last one. She pushed closer into him, and he couldn't help his rising interest. Maybe she did... but no. She raced away from him, and he laughed, immediately giving chase. Your turn to chase, Khari. Think you can catch me?

He sure would try.

His heart already raced, eyes already bright. This time, he did let his wings stretch out, feeling them cut through the air as he ran. He breathed in the sea breeze again, savoring it all over again mixed with her scent trailing ahead of him. It took all he had to slowly catch up to her, snapping at her flank any time he got near enough and laughing. He always had so much fun chasing and playing with her, even when she was so much smaller.

With a short burst, he pushed himself as hard as he could, finally so close to catching her. He used a little help from his wings to lift him, propelling forward just enough to catch her hips and drag her down with him, grazing his teeth playfully against her as he held her. They splayed out again and he landed above her, smiling down with bright eyes and his chest heaving.

Hah! I can catch you!
Damn, and she was beautiful. He couldn't help but trace her face and admire every little detail he found. She was growing so fast, it felt like. So gorgeous.

Cheater, he heard, and he laughed. It sounded more like praise from her. Silly girl. Sneaky, she called him, and he beamed back at her, watching her as they both struggled to catch their breath. I guess you can catch me, she said, smiling up at him. He nodded. Then she reached for him again, nuzzling her nose into his chin, and he closed his eyes. God, she felt so good. He loved when she touched him. You played dirty and used your wings. Good job.

He grinned down at her, a wicked light flashing in his eyes. I can play dirty at lots of things, he promised, or warned, and dipped his head to her. He pushed into her mind and filled her, wrapped around and entwined with her as they used to while his nose buried into the soft join of her neck and shoulder. Safe, they were safe here. So far away. Safe.

He meant to tickle her, kneading at that place that always made her giggle. God, but he was breathing her in, feeling her pressed beneath him, twisted and tangled so perfectly in her mind, and he might have gotten a little carried away again. His playful nudging turned into nips and pinches, his pulse soaring. He could hardly breathe, and his blood ignited, molten and rushing through him. Then he was kissing, deep and tasting her skin while he was immersed in her thoughts and swirling, drowning. Drowning.

He groaned into a kiss, suckling the flesh of her neck. Fuck, she tastes good. Something about that was.. louder? Oh god, he was - too deep, I - couldn't let go, couldn't back - off. Fuck, let her go. Oh, god. Tangled, so tangled. Too far, too far. He groaned again. Fucking let her go. But he - don't wanna. No. Yes - he had to pull back somehow. Felt so good, though. He loved being in her mind with her. Such a beautiful mind.

His mouth broke away from the soft grey of her with a gasp. "Sorry," he breathed. Oh, man. God that - felt so good. Let go, let go. He definitely - want more. Fuck, stop thinking about it. "Sorry... sorry." God, she could hear him. How much - is she hearing? Fucking think, control this. Back off. But he couldn't, wouldn't. Locked in place, panting. He wanted - more. No, she doesn't want - this. He couldn't do this. But he couldn't force himself back. Didn't want to. Okay, fucking breathe.

He couldn't fucking breathe, couldn't think with her arching into his kisses. He groaned, and fuck, she was squirming under him as he panicked, as his mind sent frantic half-thoughts and his blood crashed through his body. He loved how restless it made her, writhing, how she seemed to enjoy what he did. God, he wanted her. Wanted to pull more thoughts from her mind as he--

But she was staring back at him, panting with him with eyes gone dark and wide and dazed. Like his. ...more. More. She liked - it, how it made her feel when he touched her. She reached, tapping his chin with her nose in that way she does, but he didn't move, couldn't move, transfixed and watching that perfect light in her eyes that settled a deep ache in his belly. Damn, he - want her.

She touched him again, soft and hesitant, still struggling to breathe. His eyes threatened to close, but he stayed locked on to hers, her lips drifting a little further up to brush just below his. They parted for her, his eyes swimming and chest heaving. Wanted to - kiss her. She knew he wanted more, he could hear that she'd caught at least that much.

More? she echoed, asked, her gaze falling to his mouth. He strangled another groan. Yes, - definitely more. Even his thoughts were breathless.

His eyes slid to her mouth, too. Then back to her eyes as he slowly leaned, pressing a tender kiss to the top of her nose. He'd done it so many times before, something familiar in all this new. The wild new that felt so good. Kali.. he whispered, finally a thought he actually meant to send to her. He watched her face as he placed another careful kiss, this time to the corner of her mouth, gauging her reaction. Not unwelcome though, and he tried again.

He pulled back, just a little, his eyes falling to her mouth again. So hard to breathe, heart racing. Couldn't think. Didn't want to. He bent again, his lips brushing hers, so softly, so gently, but before he could pull away again, he was already back for another. This time just a little firmer, a little more sure. Kali.. he said again, retreating once more to study her expression.