[private] oh me oh my, i thought it was a dream... [jen pony]

K

oh me oh my, i thought it was a dream...

Although days (three, to be exact) have passed since my rebirth, a distinct lack of groundedness finds a home in me. Unreality becomes me. Wandering aimlessly with Lilliana keeps my corporeal form safe at least, and when I do resurface mentally, she is extremely pleasant and kind company. Company I find myself getting excited for every time I exit a trance; like the first time I resurfaced in the riverlands decades ago, I am protected by a liver figure. Despite her youth, Lilli reminds me of my step-mother, Insignificance. That thought leads me to another trance, one where a false wind tickles my fur, where my father and step-mother hold me and greet me in the land I reunited us in. Hyaline.

A loud exclamation reminds me of my body, a sound quickly met and soothed by dear Lilli. Her gentle touch and kind words ease the pain that had speared itself through my chest at the memory of such happy times. While I am thankful to be alive, and by all means thankful to have this stranger doting so devotedly upon me, I am lonely. I am left wanting. I am... without.

Gulping, I move as though to continue our solemn journey through the riverside forest. At the last moment, however, the pseudo-magic which has been laying claim to my sanity glitches - a sensation like that of dream-teleportation besieges me - and before my hoof falls, I am suddenly alone.

Alone, with no one to reassure me of what is reality, and what is not.

"Lilli?!"

The shrill call scares nearby birds who'd not anticipated a teleporter. Their wings shuffle quietly as they rise.

"Lilliana?!"

But no one answers, of course.
Around me, leaves turn to ash, snowing from the treetops without grace or elegance. It's only a dream, I tell myself desperately, swallowing back against the bile that rises in my throat. Twigs creak and break nearby, vibrating on the ground (or is the ground vibrating?) as I try to remain calm.

Fuck.