06-19-2019, 03:55 PM
OPHANIM
He kissed each of his brood goodbye and told them he had to leave for a while. Ophanim doesn’t want them to see him like this, depthless black like the singularity pit of a miserable black hole. He’s been gone for hours, perhaps days at this point but he isn’t so good at keeping track for the time being. His sons and daughters loved to visit him in the meadows or the rivers where they could curl beneath his wings and play but now he is alone. For a flickering moment, he considered returning to his prison in Sylva and scorching their trees but it seemed like a great deal of effort.
He just wants to stand in the river, right now.
He lets his wings droop into the cool waters and watches as a loose feather floats away from him, bleeding back to its original golden color as it bobs along the surface. Anger isn’t something he’s accustomed to and he isn’t sure what to do with this burning inside his chest. It withers into sadness here and there as he reminds himself that everything wrong right now is entirely his fault – Sylva, Starsin, all of it. But he loves his children, doesn’t he? He tries his best to teach them right from wrong and he hugs them close when they’re frightened.
But the rest of life isn’t quite so easy as that. Self-doubt comes creeping in whenever he’s alone and he wonders how anyone could love him at all. Ophie lowers his head to watch his reflection shudder and flicker in the water but the face never quite matches him anymore. His halo and the lines across his face burn bright as ever but he wonders if he should have remained the boy he was born as – simple and content. It’s far too late to turn back time now, though, he tells himself as he scans the river for anything else to focus on besides this pity party.
His long legs carry him easily against the water’s current as it splashes against his dark chest. An occasional fish clumsily bumps into his legs and he smiles weakly as they quickly dart away from him. Ophanim comes to a stop beneath the shade of an old tree overhanging the water, admiring the glimmering scales of the fish resting here beside him. The autumn sun is still warm beyond this patch of shade and he briefly wonders why they don’t seek it out instead. But then, why doesn’t he?
He just wants to stand in the river, right now.
He lets his wings droop into the cool waters and watches as a loose feather floats away from him, bleeding back to its original golden color as it bobs along the surface. Anger isn’t something he’s accustomed to and he isn’t sure what to do with this burning inside his chest. It withers into sadness here and there as he reminds himself that everything wrong right now is entirely his fault – Sylva, Starsin, all of it. But he loves his children, doesn’t he? He tries his best to teach them right from wrong and he hugs them close when they’re frightened.
But the rest of life isn’t quite so easy as that. Self-doubt comes creeping in whenever he’s alone and he wonders how anyone could love him at all. Ophie lowers his head to watch his reflection shudder and flicker in the water but the face never quite matches him anymore. His halo and the lines across his face burn bright as ever but he wonders if he should have remained the boy he was born as – simple and content. It’s far too late to turn back time now, though, he tells himself as he scans the river for anything else to focus on besides this pity party.
His long legs carry him easily against the water’s current as it splashes against his dark chest. An occasional fish clumsily bumps into his legs and he smiles weakly as they quickly dart away from him. Ophanim comes to a stop beneath the shade of an old tree overhanging the water, admiring the glimmering scales of the fish resting here beside him. The autumn sun is still warm beyond this patch of shade and he briefly wonders why they don’t seek it out instead. But then, why doesn’t he?
you could drown in those eyes, i said.