and you say that i hurt you in a voice like a prayer, leliana - Printable Version +- Beqanna (https://beqanna.com/forum) +-- Forum: Explore (https://beqanna.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?fid=1) +--- Forum: The Common Lands (https://beqanna.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?fid=72) +---- Forum: River (https://beqanna.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?fid=82) +---- Thread: and you say that i hurt you in a voice like a prayer, leliana (/showthread.php?tid=21432) Pages:
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and you say that i hurt you in a voice like a prayer, leliana - vulgaris - 10-31-2018 VulgariS take me, take me back to your bed. i love you so much that it hurts my head.
There will be risks, leaving the Pampas as he does now. He knows this and still he runs headfirst into the fray. His legs carry him as quickly as he can manage and only one thought drives him until he’s soaked in sweat, glistening in the setting sun like some reckless diamond. Vulgaris’s strides show no signs of slowing as he spots the river up ahead. No, he plunges straight through and onto the other side. He has to find her. He has to know she’s alright. And if she’s not, then the plague can have him anyway.say, i don't mind you under my skin. oh, let the bad parts in, the bad parts in. But then he spots her. She’s red like life, like everything he’s ever wanted. And she’s sick. Vulgaris slows until he’s in front of her, pulling her close with his head over her neck in sweet reunion. She’s burning hot to the touch and he doesn’t know what to do or say to comfort her now. His lips find the curve of her throat, still practiced and greedy for her as before while he kisses along her skin. This is the only heaven he’s ever known, he thinks. This is the closest to God that anyone could hope for. The apologies come bleeding from his lips so readily. “I’m so sorry. I never wanted you to go. I never wanted you to think you weren’t enough,” he mumbles against her skin. More and more words flood the air between them but his voice is too slurred between ugly, shaking sobs to make sense. He closes his eyes tight and tries to just be thankful she’s alive. But god, what does this mean for her future? What does this sickness mean for their unborn baby? He doesn’t dare give voice to these horrors but instead lets them eat away at him from the inside with the guilt and shame. Before now, he never knew the greatest way to punish him was through the ones he loved. Break his bones, whip his back, set him on fire – all of this would be fine with him. But to see his true love ill and to dangle his children’s lives before him? This was pain he never knew existed. RE: and you say that i hurt you in a voice like a prayer, leliana - leliana - 10-31-2018 I waited for something, and something died it's our dearest ally, it's our closest friend @[vulgaris] RE: and you say that i hurt you in a voice like a prayer, leliana - Random Event - 10-31-2018 @[vulgaris] has rolled a 5 and is infected. He also rolled a 6 so he's just a carrier. Lastly he rolled a 4, so he won't express a new trait. @[leliana] rolled a 3 - congrats, you can pick a carried trait to express! RE: and you say that i hurt you in a voice like a prayer, leliana - vulgaris - 10-31-2018 VulgariS take me, take me back to your bed. i love you so much that it hurts my head.
He doesn’t know what occurred in Pangea but he saw the dream same as everyone else. Being a butcher for someone he doesn’t know never interested him and he always loathed magicians anyhow. A bluff, he thought at the time. Had he known that Leliana was caught in the battle, he would have stayed by her side and torn apart anyone who tried to harm her. But he was too busy languishing in his cage and feeling sorry for himself. He wasn’t there to drag her away to safety when everything lost control. What a miserable failure for a husband.say, i don't mind you under my skin. oh, let the bad parts in, the bad parts in. And yet she presses against him like nothing has happened. She says his name and it feels something like absolution, like the quiet death of his sins, mumbled gentle against him. It becomes easy to forget the awful world continuing on all around them for just a moment before she shoves him away. He staggers back, furrowing his brows in confusion as he looks up at her. The wounds had just begun to heal and now they've ripped open again. He’s choking on the agony flooding up into his throat and it burns all the way through his head. Now it’s her turn to banish him, it seems. He takes a step back, obeying like the spineless worm he’s always believed himself to be. Shiya was right. No one could ever love a monster like him. How stupid, how arrogant to believe miracles could happen to him. “I understand. You don’t have to pretend to love me,” he says as he lowers his head to avoid her gaze. The words Shiya said to him play on a constant loop in his head, mocking him with her cruel laughter. But his legs won’t move and he can’t bring himself to leave her side again. Even in the haze of misery, he believes it would be worth getting sick to make sure she’s alright. “At least let me walk with you so I know you’ve got somewhere safe to stay. I’ll leave you alone after that.” His body yearns for hers the way ancient leviathans crave the dark, silent depths of the oceans. Primal, innate, and older than time itself. He wants to sink into her and sleep there for centuries in her perfect embrace. But she doesn’t want that. Vulgaris was only a stand-in for something much greater than whatever he thought he could offer. It’s only a few feet but it feels like a canyon has opened up between them. “If Shiya ever tries to hunt you, I’ll rip her throat out. Even if you’re done with me.” RE: and you say that i hurt you in a voice like a prayer, leliana - leliana - 10-31-2018 I waited for something, and something died it's our dearest ally, it's our closest friend @[vulgaris] RE: and you say that i hurt you in a voice like a prayer, leliana - vulgaris - 11-01-2018 VulgariS take me, take me back to your bed. i love you so much that it hurts my head.
He watches her warily as the lines of her face turn sharp and cruel, her anger spilling into the words she spits at him without hesitation. But he does not recoil from her or the awful shame that coils tight around him when she speaks. The word ‘sister’ twists his stomach into tight knots until he can hardly breathe with the weight of his awful guilt. Never in the silent winter nights had he ever breathed a word of the sick desires that hung like bait from cold metal hooks. He kept it all stitched inside where no one could see it.say, i don't mind you under my skin. oh, let the bad parts in, the bad parts in. But she knows, she knows. God, she fucking knows. His gaze drifts between the ground in front of him and her chest, never daring to stare into the heat of her eyes. She is red like fire, he thinks now. And still she claims to love him and every wicked facet of his being. A trick, a trick. It has to be. Because if it isn’t, then Shiya lied and he pushed his lover away for nothing. All his fault for nothing. The thoughts flicker in and out like a bad fluorescent bulb, buzzing and scraping at his skull. He wants to bash his face into a rock to make it all stop. “I don’t know what to do, Leliana. I don’t even know how to begin,” he says as he finally lifts his head to look at her face. Her cheeks are thin and tired while blood trickles from her lips. If only she could claw him open and use the parts she needed, he thinks. But that’s not how these things go. At the end of the day, he is alone with what he’s done. “I need you. I’m sorry I never said it, but I do. I need you with me or I just lose it,” he finally confesses. “I’ll tell you anything you want to know. No more secrets, no more bent truths. I’ll give you everything you want.” He dares to take a step closer, then another, until his lips touch her cheek with a feather-soft kind of delicacy. It fills his mouth with ash to even think of finally cracking open his ribs and revealing all the festering secrets within him. But she is worth it and he finally relents to his needs instead of his repulsive desires. Slowly, he kisses until his lips are just behind her ear. “Please don’t leave me. Please, please stay with me forever.” His voice shakes around the words and comes out so thin he’s afraid she won’t hear him. But then he is silent, holding his breath that she’ll agree to be his one more time. RE: and you say that i hurt you in a voice like a prayer, leliana - leliana - 11-01-2018 I waited for something, and something died it's our dearest ally, it's our closest friend RE: and you say that i hurt you in a voice like a prayer, leliana - vulgaris - 11-02-2018 VulgariS take me, take me back to your bed. i love you so much that it hurts my head.
Looking at her, it’s so easy to imagine how many times he would walk through fire just to stay near her like this. Shiya fades from his memory when he looks into her eyes and all the shadows flee in the light of her love. The world goes quiet when she’s around. His thoughts don’t race to violence, to disaster, and back again. She is an oasis in the desert of his life, he thinks, and he wants to stay with her until the end of time takes them both. She says his name and it’s the first drink of water he’s had in a hundred years.say, i don't mind you under my skin. oh, let the bad parts in, the bad parts in. He lifts his chin to fully expose the most vulnerable parts of his neck. This is a solemn promise of trust, of the absolute love he feels for her and their growing family. Vulgaris lips at curve of her neck when she buries her face in his neck. It feels wrong not to kiss her skin every moment they’re pressed tight together like this. She explains how she never wanted to leave Loess or him and the relief washes over him to hear her say it. But they have to face the dangers that lie ahead. He knows this. “No one will harm our family, Leliana. I won’t let them,” he explains as he kisses along to her shoulder, relearning the curves of her body. His pale green eyes examine the swell of their next unborn child within her belly. “Come home. We’ve found somewhere protected from the plague for the Loessians and Sylvans to stay for now.” His eyes betray the fear seeping into him, though, knowing that Shiya has already found her way to the Pampas. But if he can keep Leliana safe, if Adna gets to come home, then he will do whatever it takes. Even if it means tearing his sister apart. (He dreams of it, knowing that she swore to harm his children. He craves it now.) Vulgaris pulls his head from her shoulder and rests his lips gently to her forehead as he tries to come to terms with what lies ahead. “Once you’re home, Wolfbane and the others can watch over you while I go get Adna.” But they each know things won’t be quite that easy. It’s going to have to get worse before it can ever get better. RE: and you say that i hurt you in a voice like a prayer, leliana - leliana - 11-03-2018 I waited for something, and something died it's our dearest ally, it's our closest friend @[vulgaris] RE: and you say that i hurt you in a voice like a prayer, leliana - vulgaris - 11-04-2018 VulgariS take me, take me back to your bed. i love you so much that it hurts my head.
Life used to revolve around hunger and anguish, the constant cycle of taking life and snapping teeth. Every night brought sleep without rest. But Leliana washes away the dried blood on his hands and kisses the scars of his face with as much love as she has to give. Her softness finds every jagged piece of him and cherishes them as much as the gilded exterior he offers. He never thought anyone would ever want to stay at his side once all the crooked secrets came spilling out of him. But here she is, and he’s more in love than ever. He sighs into her mane at the thought of it.say, i don't mind you under my skin. oh, let the bad parts in, the bad parts in. He listens when she speaks and nods quietly when she professes her faith in his choices. Somehow, he’ll find a way to bring them all together once more. Vulgaris listens closely when she tells him that she’d like Chaol to join them in their new home. He’s careful to memorize the name for when he goes to find Adna, to make sure he’s invited to the Pampas. “I’ll find him when I go get Adna. Don’t worry, Leli,” he mumbles against her skin as he nuzzles his face against hers. Before, he might have bristled at the mention of Dovev, but he surrenders to her wishes. He supposes that seeking him out is the least he could do in exchange for trying to protect Leliana in Pangea. Vulgaris sighs and the sound is tired, but he nods again. “Alright. I’ll find them both for you, once you’re safe.” He lifts his head abruptly when her breathing changes and she chokes out his name, gilded in fear and panic. She’s already so weak, he thinks as he watches her body begin contractions. Vulgaris glances around them from time to time, keeping an eye out as he watches over her. He lowers his head to gently kiss her forehead each time she groans in pain. With Adna, everything has been so beautiful and serene. Her birth had been joyous and celebrated, but now he’s terrified for this baby. They’re far from home and the winter winds are not kind. But then Sabbath enters this world, all legs and gentle cries as she blinks her wide eyes. A little nub that will someday be a horn grows from her forehead, he notices with some surprise. The newborn girl sneezes and rolls onto her belly as she stares up at them, trying to focus her eyes enough to stare at her parent. Vulgaris lowers his head and gently touches his lips to her face once Leliana finishes cleaning her. He supposes it’s his turn to name their child. God, he thought he had more time to think about this. “She looks like you,” he says as their newest daughter begins trying to wobble onto her little hooves. She’s much smaller than Adna had been but her scales shimmer just the same. It takes her a while but she manages to stand up before too long. Her doe eyes blink softly as she begins to shiver and step between her parents, huddling against each of them for warmth. “Sabbath,” he finally says as he meets Leliana’s eyes again. “I want to name her Sabbath.” |